Rollers vs. Putas - be there!

WHAT: Holy Rollers vs. Putas del Fuego
WHEN: Sunday, April 29th, doors @ 6pm, bout @ 7pm
WHERE: Austin Convention Center, 500 East Cesar Chavez, Austin TX

Heaven versus Hell, spicy versus sweet - either way it's delectable destruction waiting to happen on Sunday, April 29 as the fiery Putas del Fuego take on the not-so-angelic Holy Rollers. The Putas have burned a ring of fire around the banked track of the Thunderdome since their Calvello Cup Championship last season. But it wasn't so long ago that the Holy Rollers were the biggest bullies on the block, and they remember a thing or two about ruling this school. Say your prayers and put on an extra layer of fire retardant long-johns - this is going to be one hot time in the old town!

Tickets are on sale at the door and on online for $15, or pick up an advance ticket for only $13 at one of our vendors around Austin. Git yer tickets now! Visit TXRD.com for all the details!






From what I understand, whoever wins this bout is automatically in the Cavello Cup, then the remaining teams will battle it out. So this bout is destined to be BADASS.

Peace out and Sk8 on! Your humble banked track editor, ÅnaRchy

Sudden Death is pretty. Cherry Bombs vs. Hellcats

DAMN. What A BOUT!

So, Sunday saw the second ‘ending-in-a-tie-sudden-death-jam’ of the season, and both of these sudden deaths involved the Cherry Bombs (1st was CB vs. PDF, PDF’s took it), but this time the BOMBs took it! The entire bout was neck and neck, with the Cherry Bombs leading for most, if not all of it, but the Hellcats were always within 5 points. The game ended tied at 22 and the Bombs put in Rocky, Hellcats put in Dixie Sanchez and due to a penalty they had to reskate the jam, talk about killing me with anticipation! Rocky took it, like I knew she would, but it was a tense couple of minutes. Can I just say that Rocky is “the shit” and I mean that with the utmost respect! She's da bomb! (pun fully intended.)

We had some great intros this time. The Bomb Squad did a great little number to “Scratch the Catbox” – very fitting and well performed! (Jasmine’s hair was kickass tonight too!) And of course, the Hellcats did something special too – Hollywood themed Rocky, with Annie Afterparty looking especially catty in full boxing gloves! The ladies skated out to the “Eye of the Tiger” and were each wearing boxing style robes. Loved it!

For the Cherry Bombs, we had Poly Urethane returning, she has a definite presence on the track, wearing her college hockey mask, full face guard and all...two words: tough lady. And an even bigger surprise: Mighty Aphrodite skating for the CHERRY BOMBS. You read right, that is NOT a typo!! She looked great in Ginjure Scraps uniform…maybe black and green are her colors? Hmmmm? Nope, I think she’s a Rhine through and through. Jamming wise we had some great skating for the Bombs by Rocky of course, and Evilyn Carnet – she’s sneaks through the pack like no one else!

For the Hellcats, Ruby Sioux dislocated her finger (it was literally sticking out in different directions – ouch!) so Titz McGee came to the rescue of the Hellcats. She has officially skated for each team this season, and if she can somehow make into the next bout, she will have skated in every bout this season. Talk about dedication! Titz came in black, prepared to throw on a green shirt or a pink shirt, depending on where she was needed. Ruby, we hope your finger is okay!

Skating wise, there was some hard ‘bitch-is-goin-down’ blocking going on, especially as the bout progressed. Tempers were flaring for sure. There weren’t too, too many fights, but the ones there were, were pretty intense. The Hellcats were hauling ass and playing pretty defensively, speeding the pack up to a crazy pace to keep the Bombs from scoring, which I think in the end just ended up exhausting everyone and frustrating the Cherry Bombs. But those kitties put up a helluva fight. I had actually predicted the Bombs by 8, and was proved wrong by those tough little pussies (can I say that? Well, I did.) Now, I’m not totally up on what’s what, but I could tell there was a lot of stuff that wasn’t getting called and it was pissing some skaters off! Blatant tripping, clothes lining, and high blocks were everywhere, but not too many calls it seemed. There were a couple of times I thought Jonny Stranger’s head was going to spin around, exorcist style…he survived, but did his clip board? That may be a different story.

This was also Cherry Chainsaw’s last in-season bout. I’m just a fan and am so sad to see her leave the track, so I can only imagine how the skaters feel! But lucky for them and us she’s still gonna be around, training and schooling these gals. I’m so glad I got to see her skate this season! Miss Chainsaw, ma’am, you will be missed on the track!

On the Turn Four Board Whore front, another friendly face has left us…Sloppy Boggins headed back on up north, where the summers are nice, you will be missed and better be back soon! But, we also had a visiting (well, 2 actually) whore: Chicago Jimmy (pleasure to meet ya!) & the Flat Hippy, V2.0. Flat Hippy has been to ATX some times before, but this time, he got to skate the entire bout hung around the lovely neck of Varuca Assault. (by 1/2 time I think he was causing some neck chaffing – those damn dirty hippies.) We also had a Flat Willy Callit stuck in the track for the bout in honor of our last turn four board whore that moved up and on to different things. I was actually there at the bout, but don’t feel as lucky as the “Flats” with their ‘rock-star’ status. Maybe I need to leave ATX during the next bout and see what kind of seat Flat ÅnaRchy can get! A spin around Sister Mary Jane's neck would be nice! ;0)

So even after the bout, the entertainment continued. Mustang Sally took on a good buddy in a different type of wrestling match – he was on skates and she wasn’t. Is it me or is that backwards? Shouldn’t Mustang be the one rollin’? Either way, it was fun to watch her try to take him down, but damn, he had some pretty slick moves! I kept yelling “get him Mustang!” and “It’s not nice to beat up girls!” It was all in good fun and with lots of love. Venis Envy and Punky Bruiser also had a full on wrestling match on the concrete floor and I don’t think anyone won per say, except those watching perhaps. Without thinking, I yelled “Be careful with my favorite Roller!” and Venis PROMPTLY came back with “What about your favorite Puta?” She got me there! I had quickly say “And with my favorite Puta, of course! Ma’am, yes ma’am!” Finally, Smarty Pants came and broke it up, but maybe it was a preview of the boiling blood that is gonna be at full throttle during the final bout in the regular season. It’s gonna be a good one, you better find a baby sitter now and get those disposable cameras ready, coz you ain’t gonna wanna miss it! Holy Rollers vs. las Putas del Fuego, April 29th. Be there. Or suck. And you don’t wanna be a sucker do ya? Well, do ya punk?

Peace out and SK8 on!
Your humble banked track editor, ÅnaRchy

Aw yeah, TONS of banked track derby action in the ATX!

Holy Cow! We've got TONS of banked track action in the ATX this week folks! You know my motto - too much derby is NEVER enough!



* On Thursday, March 15th, we've got the Arizona Renegade Rollergirls coming in for a rematch – those of you who watched the A&E series Rollergirls – these are the same ladies coming back for more! Doors at 7pm, bout begins at 8pm. $13 advance, $15 at the door

* Wanna rub elbows with some of your favorite gals? Rumor has it they will be out in force Friday, March 16th, at Momo's to rock out to Sinister Muse, from 12-5pm.

* Now this is cool! Saturday, March 17th from 2-6pm TXRD FREE Open House at the Convention Center! Come check out TXRD and visiting skaters doing their thing on the track, hear live bands and buy some TXRD merchandise and some drinks while you are there. If you are a rollergirl and will be in Austin, email purrana@txrd.com - we'd love to see ya!!!! Then from 8-11pm Utah Saints (http://www.myspace.com/utahsaints) are gonna rock out while TXRD skaters scrimmage at the Convention Center. $ 20 at the door.

* Then, as if all that ain't kick ass enough – we've got a regularly scheduled bout – Sunday, March 18th, the Holy Rollers are taking on the Cherry Bombs. Now, people, this is a bout you don't wanna miss. The Holy Rollers are gonna bring it with all they have, and as far as I know, all the favorites (and badasses) are gonna be rollin' – Sister Mary Jane, Miss Conduct, Smarty Pants, Punky Bruiser, Horrowshow, Sacrlicious, just to name a few. And we all know they Cherrybombs have the talented Rocky Casbah (can I just say she's my favorite rookie this season!) and she's got Heathen, Cherry Chainsaw, Dyna-Dash, Stoli watching her back. It's gonna be on! Doors at 6pm, Bout at 7pm. $13 advance, $15 at the door.

As always, for the full-on-real-deal visit TXRD.com or http://www.myspace.com/txrd

Peace out and Sk8 on!
Your humble banked track editor, ÅnaRchy

Texas Rollergirls 3-4-07 Bout Update

It was a great start for the TXRG organization. I was both proud & lucky enough to serve on Production Crew, not only setting up for the bout but also be one of the Penalty Timers during the bout. And frankly...it was AWESOME! I can't lie or even attempt to play it "Joe Cool" here. It was a total fucking blast!

The season opener was sort of strange cause for the 1st time in TXRG history, there were a ton of trades in the pre-season. So it was absolutely crazy seeing girls like, for example, Buckshot Betsy skating for the Hell Marys instead of the Honky Tonk Heartbreakers. But variety is the spice of life & it looks like TXRG is entering the wild world of derby free-agency. It will be interesting to see what happens at the end of the 2007 season & where the chips will fall.

If you are into deep technical & play summary of the bouts, then do visit Phil Arnold. Phil gives great game summary, stats, & technical insight into every bout he attends. I wouldn't dare dream of trying to top it...there is a reason why he is the TXRG Super Fan! You can visit him Here & Here.

However, since I was effectively in the Penalty Box all night, I can tell you this...
The 1st period was filled with straight forward derby play. I recall 4 girls spending time in the box during the ENTIRE 1st half, (Dinah Mite, Lady X, Tinkerhell, & ???), 3 during the Hustler/Hell Mary bout & only 1 during the Honey/Heartbreaker bout.

But during the 2nd half, things got wild. Penalties were CAH-RAZY during the Hustler/Marys 3rd quarter. Slim Kickens was in there twice and stand-out "rookie" Lady X spent some time with us as well, as did Lady Stardust, and a few other girls. And at one point, we had 3 girls in the box at once. It got slightly hectic for us, especially for me as a newbie. I ain't gonna lie...I can't remember everyone cause, like a newbie on the job the 1st day of work, I was just trying to keep up & not screw up horribly. (And I did have 2 sad moments. A HUGE thanks goes out to Vicious van GoGo, Hog Wild, & *especially* Friction VixXxen of the Denver Roller Dolls for helpin' me out & always being there to back me up. BIG Love!!!) The 4th quarter was a bit tamer, although we had plenty going on penalty wise.

Next time, I'll bring a pad & pen, like a good little reporter, & write all this shit down. But frankly, I wasn't really there to do blog business this TXRG bout. I was just trying to LEARN & do the job at hand. (There is a huge difference between being an observer & having to keep track of the fast-paced action. I was schooled this lesson on Sunday, fo sho!) And while it might seem easy, there is definitely an art to knowing the rules, (which change as the sport rapidly grows & a new national par is set each year), execute the rules properly & fairly, and following a wicked fast game/jam while still being able to watch/hear the refs, rollergirls, announcers, and pay attention to the penalty clock in your hand all set to the tune of loud rock music you must yell over. It's definitely a job that I hope to perfect in the upcoming bouts, if given the chance.

I managed to take a few pics during the 2nd half, when there WEREN'T girls in the box, & I will get them developed ASAP & posted. (I took a disposable cam just cause I didn't want to deal with pockets & keeping up with a digital cam.) But frankly, I CANNOT wait for the next bout. Pics coming soon.

Sunday Sunday Sunday!!

How lucky are we in Austin? We have another TXRD Lonestar Rollergirls banked track bout this Sunday! Will the Rhinestone Cowgirls be able to herd the Hellcats? Come and find out!



Visit TXRD.com for more details on where to get advance tickets (save yo'self $2!)

TXRD: Cherry Bombs vs. Putas del Fuego Tonight!

Click on Event Poster for larger size.

What happens when you mix a bunch of explosives with a whole lotta fire? You only get *one* guess...

This is the bout you've been waiting for - the up 'n coming Cherry Bombs are taking on the Putas del Fuego! They're the new kids on the block, and before anyone could blink they won a couple of amazing victories, giving our loyal fans some of the best derby action they've ever seen! They're not letting up either, and come tonight, who knows where the smart money will be. Check out pics of the '07 CB's here.

The Cherry Bombs have a Texas-sized chip on their shoulders and a short fuse to go with it. Powerhouse veterans like Cherry Chainsaw and Varuca Assault are anchoring the team, with new soon-to-be superstars like Rocky Casbah and Heathen carrying on the speed-demon tradition started by Lucky Harm in last season's bouts. Short fuse or not though, the Putas are going to put up just as big a fight! The Putas have a fearsome line-up and their mettle has withstood the test of time. Same ol' Putas? Not by a long-shot! Just when you think you know'em, those Putas are going to light the banked track on fire like never before! They're gonna knock that chip off the Bombs' shoulder, and maybe just light that fuse when they're not lookin'! Check out pics of the '07 PDF's here.

Tickets are on sale at the door and on online for $15, or pick up an advance ticket for only $13 at one of our vendors around Austin! Doors at 6pm, Game at 7pm.

Dust Devil 2007 Champions

Championship Bout:

• Rat City All-Stars : 83
• TRD Saddletramps : 72

Final Top 4:

1. Rat City All-Stars
2. TRD Saddletramps
3. Texas Texecutioners
4. Kansas City Roller Warriors
   

The Top 4 advance to the 2007 WFTDA National Championships in Austin, TX on September 28-30. They will represent the West vs. the top 4 teams in the East.

All I can say is I'll be workin' my ass off to be at Nationals. I wouldn't miss it for the world!

Dust Devil '07 - Day 2

Yesterday, the Texecutioners beat the Sin City Neanderdolls 121 to 49. That's a 72 point blow-out, folks!

In about an hour & a half, the Texecutioners will face off with the Rat City All-Stars out of Seattle for the #1 spot. The bout begins Day 3 at 1pm MST.

Go Texecutioners!!!

TXRD Valentine's Day Massacre final score!

Hey there derby fans! We're working hard on getting together a play-by-play bout recap posted...complete with pics and videos, but great things take time...so keep checking back...for now, I leave you with my personal favorite pics of the evening...The final score was Holy Rollers: 72 Rhinestone Cowgirls: 43
Peace out and sk8 on! ÅnaRchy

The Bloggers with killer Miss Conduct


The Bloggers with Å's hero, Punky Bruiser


And last, but certainly not least, The Bloggers with the infamous and totally badass Sister Mary Jane

Valentine's Day Massacre TONIGHT!

Tonight, the Rhinestone Cowgirls saddle up again to take on their longtime rivals, the Holy Rollers. This family feud dates back to three consecutive battles for the Calvello Cup, and the hatred between the rowdy roughnecks and the unrepentant school girls runs deeper than the Rio Grande River.

Will the Rollers hog tie the cowgirls and brand them with a big "L" for loser? Or will the cowgirls run the naughty school girls into the mud in a stampede they won't soon forget? Pick your side, load your six shooter, and stake your claim for this one; it's a shoot'em out you won't want to miss!

• Who: Rhinestone Cowgirls vs. Holy Rollers
• When: Sun. Feb. 11, 2007
• Where: Austin Convention Center, 500 East Caesar Chavez, Austin
• Map: http://www.austinconventioncenter.com/Maps/index.htm
• Tickets: http://www.txrd.com/tickets.htm

And the word on the street is:
"Some rollergirls will have stensils with a bad ass message, so wear a shirt you wouldn't mind being spray painted...ssshhhh, don't tell anyone you don't like! :) "

Click on the Event Poster to view larger size:

TXRD: Holy Rollers VS. The Rhinestone Cowgirls!

Banked track derby fans, this is a bout you ain't gonna wanna miss - there's no love lost between these two teams and I'm sure we'll see plenty of proof come Sunday!

• WHO: Holy Rollers vs. the Rhinestone Cowgirls
• WHERE: Austin Convention Center
• WHEN: Sunday, February 11th
• Doors @ 6pm, Bout @ 7pm
• WHY: If you need to ask, you're on the wrong blog site
• HOW: By the good grace of God

*Tickets are $15 buck-os at the door, or buy 'em early and save some cash-ola! ($13 at Front Gate Tickets, Pronto Food Mart, Headhunter's Tiki Bar, Spiderhouse, Glassy Knoll, The Onion, Lowbrow Emporium & The Texas Chili Parlor)

*Park on the street or in the Convention Center garage (caddy-corner from the Convention Center itself) for $7

Entry fee: $15
Parking: $7
Drinks: $15
Live Roller Derby Action: Priceless.

Cowgirls Win...65 to 57 over the Hellcats

Or something like that. I admit it...I'm a bit drunk on Lonestar Tallgirls at the moment. The Hellcats dominated the 1st half, then the Rhinestone Cowgirls took over the 2nd half.

Pics to come....hubby was roving reporter. He got some front line pics as well as a cool Chola pic. (I'm a big fan so hubby was all about pleasing....bless him.) However, I trumped him with my Ms. Conduct pic. And we got some other really cool personal pics.

Must...post....soon....

Holy Rollers vs. Putas Del Fuego

Okay, so the 2nd bout of the 2006 season is Sunday the 29th. And I think I'm definitely going. I'm going to attempt to buy tickets tonight. Wish me luck.

I wasn't able to go to the 1st bout on the 15th featuring Cherry Bombs vs. Hellcats. From what I understand, it was a good match with the Hellcats (I believe) winning by 3 points. It was a rough match though...

(From the TXRD message boards)
Post:
Lawbaby- Landed on her face and broke her nose. Cherry Bombs
Annie Afterparty- Lawbaby elbow blocked Annie and she was low or something, and she broke her nose. Hellcats
Varucca Assault- Cracked ribs, EMT popped them back in. Cherry Bombs
Sweetie Switchblade- Cracked ribs, nursing em back to health. Hellcats
Evilynn Incarnit- Kidney shaped bruise on her tookus (butt). Cherry Bombs

Another Post:
Actually.....
Annie Afterparty got her nose broken from Lawbaby elbowing her while throwning some punches in the bench-clearing brawl that happened in the first quarter.
Varuca Assault only dislocated her rib and the EMT's popped it back in.

WOW....sorry I missed that one. I hope all the girls are healing & okay. This Sunday's bout should be great though. I'm determined not to miss it.